By: Sumi Ishida
How tidy do you keep your home? Spick and span? A little messy? Or perhaps as though a mini tornado passed through? Well, we’ve all been there at one point or another. A busy day, week, or month, and the dust collects. Now picture you got a pop-by visit from your school chancellor in the midst of it.
Roughly a week ago, I first noticed the peculiar decorations in the dorm pathways. A mattress on the soggy cement, blanket and pillows to match, hanging from the strands of lights that illuminate the sidewalk, several jerseys strewn about. Initially I suspected this to be a prank on one of the teams, as such is not too unusual, but after a day or so I found an email in my inbox that nodded to a greater issue.
That’s right, Iwao Akihito himself paid a surprise inspection on the sports team dormitories, and he wasn’t too pleased with what he saw. Turns out not only had the exteriors been made a mess, but the hallways needed some serious spring cleaning as well! Trash bags, piles of clothes, and failed test sheets littered the hallways. With such a health risk threatening the school’s strict standards, he called for a dorm-wide cleaning, lest the buildings be shut down temporarily as a consequence (and to probably fumigate the residence).
This did not bring down the spirits of the teams however, instead lighting a new sense of community and teamwork as every sport pitched in to sweep and polish each floorboard and picture frame. It could truly warm the heart to see such camaraderie. Alas, the age old Spartan vs Bobcat rivalry could not be swept away with the dust. A plot was brewing.
As the deadline drew closer for Mr. Akihito’s fateful follow-up inspection, things began to go wrong. At first it was nearly imperceptible. A trash bag showing up where someone had just cleaned. Muddy footprints in a hallway just mopped. However, these anomalies grew. As hours ticked down to minutes, pipes burst, toilets clogged, floors flooded, could these dorms truly be saved? One plunger broken, two plungers broken.. and a snow shovel surprisingly came in clutch! With the water draining quickly, it almost seemed as though all was going to be alright.
Mr. Iwao Akihito scanned the buildings with great detail, no sweaty pom-poms nor unwashed cups slipped by his keen eye. While the athletes held bated breath under each scrutiny, in the end the dorms managed to receive a pass, a sigh of relief ushering through the crowds… but not for long.
To congratulate the teams on a job well done, Mr. Akihito led them to his office to retrieve reward stickers for their efforts, however what awaited him was far from rewarding. His office was turned to filth, piled high with trash bags, the contents of which coated the floor. A single sticky note would read “From your Spartan teams… can’t take our dorms!”. Screams of anger erupted through the crowd, fingers pointed every which way, Spartans blamed for the note, Bobcats accused of framing them, madness ensued… and with each passing moment Mr. Akihito’s silent rage grew until his patience broke.
ALL teams were threatened with detention, or worse, a complete dismissal of all members from their sport if the office wasn’t polished to perfection. With a few untraceable grumbles from within the crowd, the teams hopped to it once again, banding together to save their sports from looming doom.
With minimal brawls the cleaning finally came to a close, unfurling Mr. Akihito’s brow, and earning back each of the 3 dorm buildings a reward sticker of approval. While the Spartan vs Bobcat dispute was sewn ever deeper, the teams within each side bonded over their shared contributions. The athletes were able to retire back to their dorm rooms, weary after a long day of commotion, just as Masaoka Shiki once wrote:
relieved of a burden
in the everyday life
an afternoon nap
